Friday, October 7, 2011

All about love

I never loved martial arts.
I was sent for martial arts class since I was standard 2. Being a kid, I had no choice but to listen. My Sunday morning's sweet dream will be disrupted and groggy me will unwillingly drag myself to the basketball court start doing punching and kicking. I quit taekwondo as a blue belt coz I had to move to Alor Setar. years later when I joined UPNM, taekwondo was compulsory and all cadets must get black belt before being commissioned as an officer. I got no choice.

As I said before, I join UPNM to be an Ironman. I love swim bike run more than anything else in my cadet's life. So I've made up my mind, go all out and get my black belt fast, then I can be exempted from martial arts. Finally I got my black belt, and months later UPNM came out with new policy saying that all cadets will start Tempur Tanpa Senjata, the previous Taekwondo belt is no longer valid. So, from black belt I turned white belt AGAIN.
How can it be possible to keep doing something u don't love for many years?
I've tried to focus, tried to love Taekwondo. I always tell myself this is for my own good. My bitter experience of getting snatched is a good reason why I should buck up my self defence. However, it didn't come from my heart. That thought came from my logical thinking. Something u don't love with all yr heart will never last long, trust me.

today's TTS, I was day dreaming all the time. I couldn't remember patterns and taegeuk.
because I never loved TTS but I'm forcing myself.
Many years of endurance racing, my passion didn't fade at all despite all the pain and bitter but meaningful experiences. I love endurance racing even deeper over the years.

some people tell me, channel your spirit and energy to your goals just like how u do in Ironman.
Left brain will do the analysis, then says that the statement above is theoretically correct. Some goals in life, we pursuit because we need to achieve it. that doesn't mean u love it. It is like somebody telling u to like Jessica Alba because she is so damn hot, yea u might like her for her hot body but u don't love her.

today's bad news, one of my rider crashed his bike.
days ago I posted on how to crash your bike skilfully to minimize the damage, and today one guy crashed horribly. all riders will surely fall, it's just a matter of time, so learn to minimize the damage. But still, juniors are so stubborn. I told them like a million times to read up and gain more knowledge so that they don't have to learn the hard way, but they will never listen. this is why seniors tend to manhandle the juniors, because they couldn't stand it anymore. I'm still keeping my clean record for not manhandling the juniors, never even once.

Be patient.

basikal mahal disangka hebat,
budak mentah baru belajar,
berbuih mulut beri nasihat,
mungkin perlu aku yg ajar.

today is my aunt's birthday. How i wish i could go home and celebrate. too bad I won't be home for 3 weeks, gotta attend Solidworks class. sigh.

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